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SEVEN WONDERS OF THE WORLD
well, does anyone really know the real seven wonders of the world....... to touch.....to taste.....to see......to hear.....to feel.......to laugh.....and most of all to love.......so go ahead enjoy it.
 
SILLY PUNS...( by Troy Rozario)
HOW DO YOU GET HOLY WATER? BOIL THE HELL OUT OF IT. WHAT DO YOU GET WHEN YOU CROSS A SNOWMAN WITH A VAMPIRE? FROSTBITE. WHAT DO YOU GET FROM A PAMPERED COW? SPOILED MILK. HOW DO YOU CATCH A SQUIRREL? CLIMB UP A TREE AND ACT LIKE A NUT. WHY DO GORILLAS HAVE BIG NOSTRILS? BECAUSE THEY HAVE BIG FINGERS. HOW DO CRAZY PEOPLE GO THROUGH THE FOREST? THEY TAKE THE PSYCHO PATH. WHAT LIES AT THE BOTTOM OF THE OCEAN AND TWITCHES? A NERVOUS WRECK.
 
CELEBRITIES WHO CHANGED THEIR NAMES.(by Troy Rozario)
BOB HOPE-LESLIE TOWNES HOPE......BOB DYLAN-ROBERT ZIMMERMAN......CHARLIE SHEEN-CARLOS IRWIN ESTEVEZ.....CHUCK NORRIS-CARLOS RAY......CONWAY TWITTY-HAROLD JENKINS.....DEMI MOORE-DEMETRIA GUYNES.....ELTON JOHN-REGINALD KENNETH DWIGHT.....FREDDIE MERCURY-FAROUKH BULSARA.....JOHN WAYNE-MARION MICHAEL MORRISON.....JUDY GARLAND-FRANCES GUMM.....KIRK DOUGLAS-ISSUR DANIELOVITCH DEMSKY.....MEL BROOKS-MELVIN KAMINSKY.....SHANIA TWAIN-EILEEN REGINA EDWARDS.....TINA TURNER-ANNA MAE BULLOCK.....WOODY ALLEN-ALLEN STEWART KOIGSBERG
 
MARKETING EXPLAINED!!!!!!!!!(by Troy Rozario)
1.YOU SEE A GORGEOUS GIRL AT A PARTY,YOU GO UP TO HER AND SAY."I`M VERY RICH "MARRY ME!".....THAT`S DIRECT MARKETING. 2.YOU`RE AT A PARTY WITH A BUNCH OF FRIENDS AND SEE A GORGEOUS GIRL.ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS GOES UP TO HER AND POINTING AT YOU SAYS:"HE`S VERY RICH" MARRY HIM.......THAT`S ADVERTISING. 3.YOU SEE A GORGEOUS GIRL AT A PARTY GO UP TO HER AND GET HER TELEPHONE NUMBER. THE NEXT DAY,YOU CALL HER AND SAY:"HI I`M VERY RICH,MARRY ME".. THAT`S TELEMARKETING. 4.YOU`RE AT A PARTY AND SEE A GORGEOUS GIRL,YOU GET UP STRAIGHTEN YOUR TIE,WALK UP TO HER AND POUR HER A DRINK,YOU OPEN THE DOOR FOR HER,PICK UP HER BAG AFTER SHE DROPS IT,OFFER HER A RIDE AND THEN SAY:"BY THE WAY,I`M VERY RICH,WILL YOU MARRY ME".....THAT`S PUBLIC RELATIONS. 5.YOU`RE AT A PARTY AND SEE A GORGEOUS GIRL,SHE WALKS UP TO YOU AND SAY`S:YOU ARE VERY RICH,CAN YOU MARRY ME....THAT`S BRAND RECOGNITION. 6.YOU SEE A GORGEOUS GIRL AT A PARTY YOU GO UP TO HER AND SAY:I AM VERY RICH,MARRY ME".. SHE GIVES YOU A NICE HARD SLAP ON YOUR FACE..... THAT`S CUSTOMER FEEDBACK. 7.YOU SEE A GORGEOUS GIRL AT A PARTY, GO UP TO HER AND BEFORE YOU CAN SAY:I`M RICH,MARRY ME" YOUR WIFE WALKS IN....THAT`S RESTRICTION FOR ENTERING NEW MARKETS.
 
DEFINITIONS OF COMMON WORDS-by Troy Rozario
ATOM BOMB-An invention made to end allinventions...................... CIGARETTE-A pinch of tobacco rolled into paper with fire at one end and a fool at the other............................................... COLLEGE-A place where some pursue learning and others learn pursuing.. DICTIONARY-A place where divorce comes before marriage................ DOCTOR-A person who kills your ills by pills,and kills you with bills. ECSTASY-A feeling when you feel you are going to feel a feeling you have never felt before................................................ EXPERIENCE-The name men give to their mistakes........................ MARRIAGE-It`s an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her masters......................................... MISER-A person who lives poor so that he can die rich................. OFFICE-A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life..... POLITICIAN-A man who shakes your hand before elections and your confidence later...................................................... YAWN-The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth......
 
HUBBIES HOWLERS.....BY TROY ROZARIO
A LITTLE BOY WENT UP TO HIS FATHER AND ASKED, "DAD,WHERE DID ALL OF MY INTELLIGENCE COME FROM?THE FATHER REPLIED,"WELL SON, YOU MUST HAVE GOTTEN IT FROM YOUR MOTHER, CAUSE I STILL GOT MINE............A DOCTOR EXAMINED A WOMAN,TOOK THE HUSBAND ASIDE AND SAID,"I DON`T LIKE THE LOOK OF YOUR WIFE AT ALL."ME NEITHER DOC,SAID THE HUSBAND. BUT SHE IS A GREAT COOK AND IS REALLY GOOD WITH THE KIDS...........AN OLD MAN GOES TO THE WIZARD AND ASKS HIM IF HE CAN REMOVE A CURSE HE HAD BEEN LIVING WITH FOR THE LAST 45 YEARS. THE WIZARD SAYS,MAYBE,BUT YOU WILL HAVE TO TELL ME THE EXACT WORDS THAT WERE USED TO PUT THE CURSE ON YOU, THE OLD MAN REPLIED WITHOUT HESITATION,"I NOW PRONOUNCE YOU MAN AND WIFE........... THE HUSBAND TOLD THE WIFE,I DON`T KNOW HOW GOD MADE YOU STUPID AND BEAUTIFUL AT THE SAME TIME. THE WIFE RESPONDED,ALLOW ME TO EXPLAIN,GOD MADE ME BEAUTIFUL SO YOU WOULD BE ATTRACTED TO ME AND GOD MADE ME STUPID SO I WOULD BE ATTRACTED TO YOU!.
 
The Anglo-Indian Dictionary

This maybe or is an old one ...but its a refresher and reminder for us all ..get your Vocabulary right man ..this is an extract from an email sent from a friend ...the list never ends ...

  • "Bolly eyes"
  • "Bully Ants"
  • "Side go, bandy coming"
  • "Pish-pash"
  • "D'eening aunty, d'eening uncle"
  • "Grog"
  • "Jow"
  • "Dilly dally"
  • "Boochies, Chochee and Cheepie-Bayo"
  • "Blow blow and drink off"
  • "Curly curly hair" or "hot hot soup"
  • "Bannana chips"
  • "Show na. Give na and "labback labback"
  • "Jignuts"-Peanuts and "Bandygoat" 
  • "Bundoos. Fly cather, Cooty Pie"                                                       
  • "Gafoon Aunty"- Good afternoon aunty and "I'll go and come"
  • "Mad bugger"
  • "I'll turn your face the otherside"
  • "Wet" for Alcohol
  • "Thus all" for Thats all 
  • Rice is "Kola Kola"
  • No taste at all "So Chappu"
  • "Take a walk" means Get lost
  • "Jungies"
  • "Bola-Bola" pants
  • "He's bluffin men"
  • "ChattyCrop" "Take the katty and kill the buffy"                                                                                      
  • "Chatty "calling kettle black"
  • "See the shake for that one"   
  • "That only knows to shake shake but nothing in the head!"
  • "Shut your Gob"
  • "That will go tom tom everywhere now!"
  • "Eyes are bigger than your stomach!"
  • "Sleep is pulling!" 
  • "I care two hoots!"                                                                   
  • "See that one doing the grand with the borrowed money!"
  • "See this one, catching the bull by its tail!"
  • "Give leg and go off!"
  • "I will give you vun backhander"
  • "My Stomach is touching my backbone"
  • "Dont get a slipper whack from me"
  • "She's always Catching crows"
  • "What Matcha all suited and booted!"
  • "Tastes like gutter water"  
  • "Mad Nora"
  • "Chilly fry, Pully fry
  • "What are YAUL doing?" "Where are YAUL going?"                                       
  • "Gift of the gab - Rubbermouth"
  • "Negpittam instead of Nagapattanam!"
  • "Made kaka/susu in his pants!!"
  • "Took off, come off, go off" "Don't bluff, where she went" (where did she go)
  • "Slowly hide some in your kerchief"
  • "This stupid child is a blinking nuisance"                                                                                  
  • "What you had for lunch child?"
  • "Aah I had Pepperwater and rice with some meat fry....
  • "Ya... shut your gob child. Pa! simply talkin" 
  • "Sonna dont go peep lover,u will fall off over the parapet!"                              
  • "im fedep with this bleddy womun" 
  • "Not even one morsel to eat child!"
  • "He broke off his leg"
  • "Big Pot Belly" 
  • "Fired Off!" (Took something)                 
  •  
    Found this anglo site

    Was just browsing when i came across this site,it has been around for quite some time and has some interesting stuff .

    Check it out

    http://www.maxpages.com/theangloindian

    -Njoy
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    Date posted: 2008-09-08

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